(First published August 2013 on www.theclubsv.org/news.)
Sometimes I am amazed at how thoroughly and viciously I can beat myself up. Not physically, but I can really take myself to task for any and every mistake I make, no matter how minor. “How could you be so stupid?" I ask myself. Unsatisfied, I observe, “what a horrible mistake!” Then, I envision a parade of horribles of how whatever project I was working on will soon spiral into destruction – all because of my mistake.
Every now and then, I am able to take a step back and stop the cycle of self-destructive chatter. On those occasions, a lyric from a Pink song resonates in my head,
“Change the voices in your head
Make them like you instead”
- “F**kin’ Perfect”
How profound! How perfect! Think of what we can accomplish if we support ourselves in the same way we support our teams. When our colleagues make a mistake, we don’t (please don’t) say “how could you be so stupid?” So, why do we say it to ourselves? And, how many times has a mistake really resulted in the worst outcome we envisioned? Once we give ourselves a break, allow ourselves to fail once in a while (after all, we are human and we learn and grow from our mistakes), we open up so many more opportunities for success.
Our challenge: make the voices in your head like you instead. Can you change the negative-speak in your head to a positive conversation? When you do, observe how it changes your outlook and your opportunities. Extra credit: can you make that a permanent habit?